Wed Wabbit


I am Wed Wabbit and it’s time to get wevenge on my enemy. This jackass fawma up the woad killed my wife 2 months ago and I gotta plan. I’m gonna thump out his eyes and weawange his smug fawma face. I will hop wight up to his ass and say, “You wememba me fawma? I’m the wed wabbit that got away!” Then I’m going to chew off his nose like a cawot. He’ll wue the day he eva fucked with Wed Wabbit.

I’ve been studying his movements. At night he dwinks tea with wum while watching Knight Wider wewuns, then he’s off to bed and out like a light in 5 minutes tops. That’s when I’m gonna sneak in and wuin his fawma face. I’m not gonna kill him just yet. That’d be too easy. I’m gonna watch thwoo the feed stow window one day and see all of his fwinds laughing at him – “HA! HA!” they’ll say, “a wabbit did that?” Yes, a wabbit did that. Wed Wabbit you jizzbweath fawmas. Then afta he gets laughed at and he’s in his bed cwying, “BOO HOO!” That’s when I’m gonna sneak back in and mudda him. Sweet dweams fawma.

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